By: Carlos Taylhardat – 3 Narratives News | August 30, 2025
Intro:
As parents, we all want the best for our children. Yet what “the best” looks like has shifted dramatically across generations. When I was growing up, my parents often claimed they knew better, perfection was expected, and questions were unwelcome. It was frustrating. Today, we have more tools, lessons learned, and a more nuanced understanding of child development.
As I’ve explored in earlier reflections on helping children find their voice and Parenting over Profit, the real breakthroughs often happen when we listen rather than dictate. Whatever your parenting style — traditional, progressive, or somewhere in between — six pillars can help children thrive: Health, Relationships, Money, Career, Fun, and Spirituality.
—
Pillar One: Health
Health is the foundation. Without it, every other pillar shakes. For kids, it starts with three basics: nutrition, sleep, and hygiene.
Research consistently shows that **sleep deprivation impacts academic performance and emotional regulation** (American Academy of Pediatrics, 2023). My rule is simple: my kids sleep at least eight hours a night. Nutrition is more debated — some swear by protein-heavy diets, others by plant-based diets. But there’s one consensus: **limit sugars and processed foods.** As Dr. Robert Lustig, a pediatric endocrinologist, famously said: *“Sugar is the alcohol of the child.”*
Teaching health isn’t just telling kids what not to eat. It’s sitting down at dinner, modelling balance, and inviting them to cook. The goal isn’t perfection — it’s lifelong habits.
—
Pillar Two: Relationships
This one hit home recently. My 13-year-old son, Elijah, went through his first heartbreak. Quietly, without telling anyone. When I asked, he finally admitted he had lost his girlfriend.
Why didn’t he share earlier? Was it a lack of trust, or embarrassment? I may never fully know — but I respected his privacy. Adolescents are negotiating identity, and relationships are their classroom.
Experts suggest that parents should *“be a coach, not a referee”* when it comes to teen friendships (Dr. Lisa Damour, *The Emotional Lives of Teenagers*, 2023). That means guiding them toward empathy and boundaries, but resisting the urge to control.
One question I always ask myself: **Do I know the parents of my child’s closest friends?** Because in reality, our children’s values are shaped as much by peer households as our own.
—
Pillar Three: Money
Money is how we exchange value in the world. Too often, kids leave home with no idea how it works.
Simple steps matter. Letting children compare prices in the grocery aisle. Showing them how much is set aside for savings. Talking about *profit margin* — the difference between cost and value — even in something as simple as a lemonade stand.
A Cambridge study found that **children’s money habits are largely formed by age 7.** That means the earlier we normalize financial conversations, the more confident they’ll be as adults.
—
Pillar Four: Career (or Calling)
For adults, careers define revenue and identity. For children, the parallel is school.
The trick isn’t to lecture about grades — it’s to help them **find pride in contribution.** When Elijah helps with chores or shares an idea in class, I point out not just that he “did it right,” but that his effort made a difference. Pride is fuel.
Stanford psychologist Carol Dweck’s research on the *growth mindset* is clear: kids who are praised for effort, not just outcome, perform better long-term. So the way we talk about their “career as a student” sets the stage for their future workplace resilience.
—
Pillar Five: Fun
Often overlooked, fun is not a luxury; it’s a pillar. Shared laughter, unstructured play, weekend hikes, or video games. Fun is where bonding happens and where kids learn joy.
When families schedule nothing but productivity, children learn life is a grind. When families make space for silliness, children learn that life can be meaningful and light. Additionally, we want to promote exciting experiences to draw from or life-changing experiences. For our family is usually hiking and skiing.
—
Pillar Six: Spirituality
This doesn’t have to mean religion. It can be as simple as teaching kids to pause, breathe, or reflect on gratitude.
Harvard’s Human Flourishing Project found that children who engage in spiritual practices — whether prayer, meditation, or family rituals — report higher resilience and lower rates of anxiety.
Spirituality teaches children they are part of something bigger. That can be God, community, or even the wonder of nature. What matters is the anchor.
—
Conclusion
Helping children become their best version isn’t about raising perfect little adults. It’s about offering them the six pillars to stand on, letting them wobble, and being there when they fall.
Parenting is not about control. It’s about partnership. And if we model balance — health, relationships, money, career, fun, and spirituality — our children learn not just to survive, but to flourish.
—
Key Takeaways
- Children thrive when parents guide through six pillars: health, relationships, money, career, fun, and spirituality.
- Sleep and diet matter more than fads — cutting processed sugar is universally beneficial.
- Teens need coaching, not refereeing, in relationships.
- Money habits form by age 7 — early lessons last a lifetime.
- Play and spirituality are not extras; they are foundations for resilience and joy.
Questions This Article Answers
- What are the six pillars of child development every parent should nurture?
- How do you help children build healthy relationships during adolescence?
- When should children start learning about money?
- What role do fun and spirituality play in resilience?
- How can parents balance guiding and respecting privacy?
Cover Image Suggestion: A soft-lit photo of a parent holding their child’s hand while walking toward the horizon — symbolizing guidance, support, and growth.